In November of 2016, I quit my job.
I was 29 years old, living with my mother-in-law, planning (and trying to pay for) a proper southern wedding and up to my eyeballs in debt.
Moral: There is never a perfect time to follow your dreams - just f*ing do it.
Having said that, this wasn't a decision that arose overnight. Leading up to the "plunge" was nearly two (count it, TWO) years of planning and prepping. Side hustling was the name of the game and building a solid client base while maintaining a full-time job is not for the faint of heart. But then again, the faint of heart never get too far.
When I started Lovingood Media, I didn't shout it from the rooftops (aka post it all over social media) or tell many people at all for that matter. The focus was on the work - not good work, GREAT work and building a clientele and referral network that was a reflection of that work and nothing else.
Now, nearly two years in - while I'm still oh so far from running a perfect business, I've learned some valuable lessons and think it's time to pass them on to other aspiring women (and men) biz owners.
Lesson #1: Ladies, if you want a seat at the guy's table. Do these two things...
1. Pull up a chair.
2. Sit.
The guy's table is only the guy's table because a woman isn't sitting at it, that's it. So don't overthink it. Your opinion is needed, your expertise is valued and your unique perspective as a woman is likely your greatest asset. Be feminine, be sensitive, be thoughtful, trust your instincts, speak with confidence...be you.
Lesson #2: Charge what you're worth. It's likely more than you think.
Take the time upfront to clearly communicate your value, lay out a detailed scope of work and share your pricing structure plainly. Although it can seem intimidating at first, talking about fees should be pretty simple. One of three things can happen - your customer is fine with the costs, the costs are too high and you negotiate, the costs are too high and you decide it's not the best fit to work together. If your client ever receives an invoice that's not what they expected, that's usually on you, not them.
My money mantra is this: do work so great that there will never be a question of value when the invoices go out.
Lesson #3: There will be haters.
Try to greet them with grace and understanding. When you're taking risks, doing things, moving, shaking... you are putting yourself "out there" so to speak. You're giving people something to criticize and it's likely that a few people will do just that. And that's okay.
I've been extremely fortunate to be around people who are jaw droppingly supportive, but have come across one reoccurring jab that goes something like this:
"That's so cuteeee, you started a little business. Awww."
While I admit this ruffles my feathers right up, if I take a step back, I realize this type of statement usually comes from someone who just doesn't truly understand my business and the scope of what I'm doing. And it's my job to help them understand.
When confronted with any "opinions" from the sidelines, refer to the words of one of my #girlboss idols, Susan Tedeschi, "Let me get by, if you're just gunna stand there. Let me get by, get out of my way."
Lesson #4: Looking good matters.
Call it shallow. Call it vain. I call it the truth.
It's less about perfection and more about comfortable confidence. Take pride in your appearance because whether you like it or not, it influences how people think of you. This doesn't mean you have to dress like or act like someone or something you're not. It means if you show up in a sundress from Forever 21 because #summer, it's going to be hard for your client to swallow your $250/hour rate. Wear clothes that you know won't need pulling, tugging or adjusting. If you walk like an elephant in heels, wear flats so you can float across that boardroom like a freaking ballerina. Invest in your wardrobe, invest in your hair, invest in your skin and nails. And write it all off.
Lesson #5: Ask for help.
It's very natural for women to think we can do it all. Truth bomb: we can't.
Raising a business from its infancy to adulthood takes a village.
Surround yourself with people who are smarter than you, people who you want to be like when you grow up. Truly listen to them when they give you advice - not waiting to respond - listening. Remember that the smartest person is the room is usually never the one that's doing all the talking. Be observant and seek out the subtle geniuses.
Lesson #6: Go all in.
Successful businesses aren't built by people who spend half of their day scrolling Instagram imagining what else they could be doing with their life. Comparison is paralyzing and you have to make a real and constant effort to stay focused.
Put yourself in a position where failure is not an option. Chips on the table.